On my very first visit to the U.K., the border agent asked me ‘who I would be staying with?’ I replied ‘my boyfriend’. The follow up question was ‘oh so are you here to get married?’ and my, perhaps over-zealous, response was ‘NO’ just here for a visit. Of course at that time I had no idea that in 6 months I would be moving to England to live with said boyfriend! And ever since that first interview with U.K. customs, the questions ‘why don’t you just married?’ had followed me around. Whenever I bring up any issues related to my visa or my ability to stay in the U.K. past the initial 2 years, the solution readily supplied by well meaning people is ‘get married!’ As if getting married is the simple, quick-fix solution.
This issue has come up again after another discussion with a border agent upon my return to England after going to New York. He asked me about my plan for when my current visa expires. I explained my plan was to leave the country November 24th when it expires and then re-enter England on a visitor visa. From that I would then apply for an unmarried partner visa. I had researched this plan and spent many hours on the home office website. Although the paperwork was going to be a bit of a headache (20 page document, cost 500 pounds, hand over my passport), it seemed do-able.
That plan has now died. The border agent informed me of why this was not such a good plan. He said there was a good chance that I would be refused entry into the U.K. in the first place as a visitor because they will know that I have been living and working here for the past 2 years and would not be a true visitor. As well, I learned that you can not transfer from a visitor visa to an unmarried partner visa. Crap.
A work visa is also, unfortunately, not an option. All visas are based on points; I had enough points to come here on the youth mobility scheme. Points are awarded based on being from Canada, an English speaking country, my education and available funds. To get a work visa, your job must be on the job shortage list. It would seem that there is no shortage of youth workers/youth justice workers in this country since neither is on the list. Even though my work would potentially be willing to sponsor me, it is irrelevant without the job shortage list element (which adds 30 points to your application).
I find it beyond annoying that despite being an educated, working woman, I do not have enough points on my own merit to earn a visa, and the right to stay in this country. While I am grateful to have a wonderful boyfriend who will essentially be my sponsor so that I can come back, it doesn’t quite seem fair. My feminist instincts are decidedly unimpressed.
So where does this leave me? As I see it, I have three options.
1. When my visa expires, leave the U.K. and move back to Canada. Matt would apply for a transfer and move with me.
2. When my visa expires, leave the U.K. and while in Canada apply for an unmarried partner visa (cost of 810 pounds), which would allow me to re-enter the country for 2 more years and continue working.
3. Get married prior to my visa expiring and then I would not have to leave in November at all.
Despite my pangs of homesickness, I don’t feel ready to move back to Canada (election results aside). I’m in a great job and they have invested in me with training and university courses. I want to stay and get more experience. I know that my life in the long run will play out in Canada, but this chapter in England is not quite finished.
The second option seems to be the most logical for me personally and for Matt and I as a couple. I wish that a work visa, or an individual visa of some kind was a realistic option but the immigration rules are strict and keep getting stricter as the current government fulfills their election promise to stem the flow of immigrants and increase jobs for British Citizens. It’s an expensive option but it does involve a lengthy holiday to Canada in November!
And so option 3 – why don’t we just get married?! Matt and I have had this discussion and it has forced us both to evaluate our true beliefs and values around marriage. Is it just a legal formality to allow me to stay in the country or is it more important? Do we want the Home Office to determine when we get married? While it wouldn’t be the only reason to get married in the first place, should it be a reason at all?
While I have had mixed feelings about marriage (more specifically weddings), this past week, I feel that I have gained some true clarity. Marriage is more than just signing a piece of paper. Marriage for a visa removes any element of romance or love.
In a way it feels like an act of desperation rather than love. If I can’t live in the U.K., if for some reason my visa application was denied, I’m not being deported to a horrible country with no freedoms. Marriage for a visa feels like a last ditch effort and I don’t really think that I’m at that point.
I love Matt and marriage is most likely in the cards for us but that is a decision to be made by us when it feels like it’s the right time and not because the UK Border Agency has given me slightly limited immigration options.
