Progress Report

So my blog has been a little bit neglected the past 10 days BUT with good reason.

I had my first house guest (Karel) come to stay for the weekend. He brought wonderful riches from Vancouver and Whole Foods. I am rationing my treats - they're in the freezer. The day Karel was leaving I got a call mid-morning from the Temp Agency asking if I was available that day. I had a few hours to get my stuff together and get to their office. Luckily, the office is in West Byfleet (where Matt's parents lived and I stayed all summer) and only one stop on the train.

This was not as straightforward as data entry. The previous temp girl had royally screwed up the entire filing system. They had fired her in the morning and I showed up in the afternoon. After a quick lesson on how to use the computer systems I was thrown into a heap of paperwork. It was now my job to go through all the work that the last girl had done and fix it.

The place I'm temping is a debt collections agency. The simple way to explain it is that a mobile phone company came onto the market in 2004 and gave people free phones and all sorts of deals. They couldn't follow through with their promises so most people cancelled. The company was very sneaky and in the contract it said you can't cancel even if the phone doesn't work. So now 6 years later all of these people are getting bills for hundreds of pounds when they thought they cancelled their contract. The obvious issue is that I'm way too sympathetic to the people who got screwed over by the mobile phone company.

My job is to deal with the angry letters that the company receives, log them into the computer and figure out the appropriate response. I'm sure that it doesn't sound that bad and I feel intense guilt for complaining about being there since I complained at least as much when I wasn't working.

Part of my general negativity bubble is that my other job prospects are not going that well. I can't seem to get an interview with companies and organizations in my field. I'm persistent and try to re-assure myself that if I was in Canada, I would probably be in the same position. I also try to remember that this is a TEMP job - even though based on the paperwork left over from the last girl my time there is indefinite.

I knew that the relationship dynamics between Matt and I would shift once I was working full time as well. Its hard for me to ask him to do chores and not feel like a nag/the boss/his mum! We're renegotiating the division of labor which resulted in a very fun Saturday night doing laundry. Our dishwasher also broke last week - I was so spoiled having one.

I'm sure that I will get more settled into the office life. People are starting to get used to my 'funny' accent and not asking me maple syrup related questions anymore. It's not all bad. I finish work at 4:30 so I have enough time to go to the gym after work and be home at a reasonable time. I also get to overhear bits and pieces of conversations that the debt collector's make that are really funny.

Some highlights:

"Sir, this is how a conversation works. One person speaks while the other person listens. While I am speaking you need to be listening with your mouth closed!"

"If this phone was taken out fraudulently, I find it hard to believe that someone would make payments on the account"

"If you're going to swear at me then I'm going to terminate this call!"

I have to stick with it and keep hoping that one of my e-mails or applications will yield a positive result.

Kicking my Own Butt

I am occasionally prone to be over-dramatic. I have been called chicken little more than once. The most recent focus of my theatrics is my job hunting and lack of actual job. My plan to work temp jobs while I continued to search for a job in my field has fallen by the wayside. I haven't been getting calls from the temp agency and the bookstores, drugstores and clothing shops are not accepting applications. In addition, For every job that I have applied for that I am qualified and capable of doing, I have received rejection e-mails/letters.

I also have meltdowns. I will go along telling everyone that everything is fine while in my head I start worrying about buying a ticket back to Canada if I can't get a job and afford to live here.

On Tuesday night, one said meltdown occurred. There was no specific catalyst but rather an accumulation of slightly irrational fears and worries. The only positive benefit of my meltdowns is that they usually lead to break throughs. And if they don't my dad is always more than happy to kick my butt over the phone/skype.

I have taken some small steps this week in the attempt to kick my own butt back into gear and hopefully get things rolling on my England life.

1. I joined the gym. Perhaps not the most logical or economical choice for an unemployed person but it helps keeps me sane and gives me something to do during the day while I apply for jobs. Even though the body analysis this morning was thoroughly depressing, at least its a place to start

2. I called and applied to join a recruitment firm in London that specializes in criminal justice jobs. I am also going to register at two more temp agencies

3. I joined a book club at the library - I'm very curious to see who else will be in the group

4. I'm trying (stress trying) to take it one day at a time and accept that moving to a new place, a new country was never going to be a piece of cake. I'm also trying not to wallow because self-pity is not a good look.

Sarah Vs. The Grocery Store

I feel like the grocery store is my home away from home. I’ve become much more interested in cooking since I arrived here and have pleasantly discovered that I’m actually a pretty decent cook. The only problem is that when I go to make a recipe not only do I not have the ingredients, I won’t have the utensils or dishes to make the recipe! After two months my kitchen is starting to be fully stocked with pots, pans, sauces and spices.

I have a love-hate relationship with grocery shopping. Before I moved to England, grocery shopping had never reduced me to tears. Since I have moved, crying while shopping has become an all too frequent occurrence.

The first grocery meltdown happened over molasses; a seemingly innocuous item. I wanted to make gingerbread cookies to take over to Matt’s parents house since they were having us over for dinner. I made us drive to the bigger grocery store that is ten minutes away rather than walk across the street to the grocery store that is closer. Matt failed to see the logic in my plan. I was also not aware that on Sundays all the stores close at 4:00 p.m.!!! I can’t shop under pressure. I quickly learned that molasses in a liquid form does not exist here. I asked numerous people who worked at the store and was met with the same blank stare each time that could only partially be attributed to my accent. The best that they could offer was molasses sugar. I bought it not knowing if it would work. We made it to the car and I realized that in the molasses hunt, I had completely forgotten about butter and the whole cookie-making project was aborted.

I miserably stared out the window for the car ride home chiding myself for being so ridiculous and being on the verge of tears over molasses! I soon realized that my being upset wasn’t entirely about the molasses. It was part of a bigger issue of not being able to find things that I needed when I needed them. It was the fact that everything was different here. It made me suddenly and acutely aware that I wasn’t at home. My first major pang of homesickness occurred over molasses.

The next grocery obstacle: egg whites. Egg whites are a staple in my fridge and have been for the past 5 years. I like them for breakfast, for baking and purely for convenience. These, like many other items, are not popular in England. They only sell them at one store that is a 15-minute drive from here. They don’t have a very large supply so I can’t stock up on the few occasions I can convince Matt to drive me there. I’ve never ordered egg whites off the Internet before but stay tuned to see how that pans out.

Then there was the Whole Foods incident. I am a health food lover. I love going to organic stores and markets. I could spend an afternoon quite happily in a health food store. I was very spoiled living in Vancouver with its high population of vegetarians, vegans and organic food lovers. Whole Foods in Vancouver on Cambie street is practically heaven. I found out that London does have Whole Foods that are accessible by train. I convinced Matt that we needed to drive there because I would probably be buying so much stuff that I wouldn’t be able to carry it home on the train. So we set off on another grocery adventure to the tiny, unremarkable whole foods. Disappointment is an understatement. I only bought some cereal because I felt that we had come all this way so I had to buy something.

While Matt already questions my sanity, my repeated meltdowns while food shopping are not helping my cause. It’s difficult to explain why I find it so upsetting when I want to buy things or make recipes and I can’t find the ingredients. Or I want to eat healthily and I can’t find what I need. It’s improving because of the sheer amount of time that I spend in the store across the road. I’m finally starting to learn the layout of the store and the different names that are used for food items.

Hopefully I’ll find work soon and grocery shopping will no longer be the high and low point of my day.

Stigmata of the Foot

Yesterday was my first day of being a temp. I was looking forward to getting out of the house and actually getting paid for a day's work. The only part that I was really nervous about was getting to the job. Public transportation is hard for me under the best of circumstances (familiar city, familiar area) so having to take an unknown bus to an unknown area was very daunting. I checked the bus schedule at least 5 times and set out really early. I got off the bus at 8:20 a.m. thinking that I had plenty of time to get there for a 9:00 a.m. start. Wrong! I walked in a big circle around the grocery store that I was supposed to be using as a landmark. After 40 minutes, two frantic phone calls to the temp agency and one to the hospital where I was supposed to be working I managed to get to the hospital only 10 minutes late.

The only element of work that I dislike is work clothes/work shoes. I am not fashionable. I have accepted this fact. I would happily wear t-shirts, jeans and sneakers (trainers) every day. I needed to dress appropriately for the job which meant breaking out the dressier shoes. These were not sky high heels. They were small kitten heels that were already broken in. As I wandered around desperately looking for the hospital, my feet were killing me. I tried to ignore it and attributed the pain to wearing heels for the first time in months.

My work day went fine once I got there. It was tedious work but interesting to read the incident/accident reports occurring in a psychiatric hospital. I also enjoyed that the guy in the office across from me spent the entire day discussing his holiday plans and telling everyone that they would be getting an extra stat holiday in 2011.

I finished my day and left in search of the bus stop for the journey home. I had no idea where the bus stop was and I'm sure that I walked at least 5 blocks more than I had to but eventually found the stop and waited 25 minutes. In Canada, when you are waiting at the bus stop that is the indication to the bus driver that you want the bus to stop because you want to get on. In England, if you want the bus to stop you have to flag the bus down. I forgot about this but luckily the bus stopped anyways. I got on and the bus driver barked at me "Next time if you want the bus to stop could you give us a clue??" I said nothing and took my seat.

A quick bus ride and I was almost home. The walk home was very slow because at this point my feet were absolutely killing me. What I didn't know at this point was that my shoes were really cutting my feet and as a result my shoes had been filling with blood all day.

I arrived at home, opened the door, kicked off my shoes and needed to use the bathroom. I really had to go so I opened the door but didn't bother putting the light on right away. When I did turn the light on, I saw a trail of bloody foot prints leading from the front door and onto the bath mats. Yes, we have carpet.

Through the help of ehow.com a quick search of how to get blood out of a carpet yielded very helpful results. By the time Matt got home, he couldn't even tell where the offending foot prints had been.

When I took off my socks and went to bandage up my feet a strange thing happened. There were no cuts on my feet. There were a few blisters and they were red and sore but no cuts. Where did the blood come from? So clearly the answer is stigmata of the foot.

The shoes have been thrown out never to be worn again!

Stay At Home Girlfriend

I have been living In England for about 6 weeks now. I have been unemployed for that period of time, which is a term that I hate. At least in the past when I didn’t have a job I could still say that I was a student. I am very fortunate to be living with a boyfriend who is supporting me financially for the most part. This is not an arrangement that is going to be permanent. I’m already uncomfortable not being able to pay my own way. I have these idealistic, egalitarian relationship ideas where you should at least strive for a 50/50 partnership. It’s very hard for me to be so reliant on another person. I’ve had a car since I was 17 up until I moved here and I’m used to being able to get behind the wheel and accomplish my errands. I live walking distance from most major stores but for bigger trips (like IKEA or big grocery shops) I have to ask for a ride.

At no point have I been told that I need to ‘earn my keep’ but since I am home almost the entire day job-hunting, it has fallen on me to take care of most of the domestic chores around the house. It’s a strange feeling - but a self imposed one that I should be taking of household tasks. Even when I do start working (tomorrow is my first temp job), I get the sense that cooking and grocery shopping are still going to be my responsibilities. Granted I am a picky eater who doesn’t really eat meat and asking a non-vegetarian to cook vegetarian meals is not going to happen (not in my experience anyway).

The feminist in me wants to argue that there is nothing inherently ‘feminine’ about household tasks and the term ‘woman’s work’ makes me cringe. When I lived on my own I did all of the same chores; cooking, shopping and cleaning up after myself. I’ve had room mates so it was slightly easier to divide up the cleaning. Now I live with someone who is away from the house 12-14 hours a day and it’s difficult to argue with ‘ You’re home all day so technically it’s your mess to clean up’. Perhaps a division of labor conversation will have to be re-visited once I’m working more.

I also find that other couples like to discuss the division of labor issue when we’re out. They are often curious to know who does what. I think part of the reason for curiosity on the part of Matt’s friends, is that he went from living at home with a very maternal mum and I’ve lived on my own and with room mates and even before that my mom never did my laundry.

We’re learning together since neither of us has ever lived with a boyfriend/girlfriend before. We’ll just have to see how it works out…

My Job Hunt

Today is January 4^th and for most people that means returning to work after the holidays. Since I don’t have a job, today is the first day back to job hunting. Step 1 – Change up my resume. I only recently had it pointed out to me that perhaps the format of my resume was the issue. After a quick google search I found that in fact my resume does need to be improved and made more concise. How motivated am I do completely overhaul my resume? Instead of working it on it, I’m writing on my blog so pretty motivated.

I’m finding it difficult to stay positive while job hunting. I know that I am qualified to work all sorts of jobs I just need to get an interview. I’m trying to keep in mind that job hunting would not necessarily be any easier if I had stayed in Canada as opposed to moving over to the U.K. When I made the decision to move, I was aware that I was taking a chance of possibly not moving forward in my career field (criminology) and would have to settle for a job that pays.

There’s a chance that I have been extremely lucky in the job department in the past and jobs have sort of presented themselves when required. I’m really hoping that since it is the New Year I will somehow be able to re-kindle that luck and things will start to fall into place.

Goals for today:

1. Change my resume/CV into a U.K. friendly format

2. Apply for jobs in my field and easy, local jobs

- C Seems manageable…

Year End Review

One of my favourite parts of New Years is the year end wrap ups (usually movie and song related). In that spirit I am now going to provide a 2009 wrap up review:

January: After spending my first Christmas in Nelson with my best friend Mandy's family, I prepared to go to Israel on the Birthright program (a free trip to Israel for any Jewish youth between 18-27). That trip was amazing and during the ten days that I spent there I felt a very strong connection to Israel and my Jewish roots. I even began to consider moving there to do religious and hebrew studies. January was also one of the last months that I was working on my master's thesis. I even brought my thesis with me to Israel to continue editing the final draft of my thesis.

February: This month was largely devoted to thesis work. The joy of submitting and re-submitting my work over and over to my thesis committee and numerous meetings with both of my supervisors. I celebrated Valentine's day in two ways. I sent valentine cards to all the important people in my life who I love trying to embrace the idea that love was not the exclusive property of people in couples. I also spent the day with my best friend/life partner Mandy. It was important that we were hanging out because in the next month she would be moving to Kelowna :(. The last weekend in February, Mandy and I went up to Whistler for a night of partying and I Met (see How I Ended up with a British Boyfriend).

March: a very eventful month! I spent time getting to know my future boyfriend who at the time was just some British guy who made me laugh. I helped Mandy celebrate as co-host at her going away party and then helped her move in to her new apartment in Kelowna. I celebrated my 25th birthday and defended my masters thesis within 4 days of each other - that was a big week! I completed the final editing of my thesis and submitted the copy to the library ( a tortuous process for anyone who has experienced it) and was, after three years, finished my masters degree!

April: I began preparing for my 4 month trip through Europe and Israel. I had my ticket booked to arrive in London on May 19th and a return ticket at the start of September and nothing in between. I am a planner and this trip was an attempt to be more at ease with not having a plan and seeing where my travels would take me. I went back to Calgary for two weeks to visit family and spend time with my dad. At this point, I was getting used to the fact that I might only see my dad, older siblings and their families once or twice a year.

May: I returned to Vancouver, worked a temporary receptionist job and prepared for my mom's wedding. My mom was getting married on a Sunday and I was departing on my trip the following Tuesday. On the Friday night before the wedding with my siblings in town for the occasion, my apartment was robbed. This was a very traumatic experience and my lap top was stolen. Everyone pointed out to me that at least my lap top had been stolen after I had completed my thesis and my camera and ipod which were beside the lap top had been left behind. The police investigated but there was never any real hope of getting it back. The apartment never felt quite the same after that.

On May 19th I flew to London for the start of my travels. I was very nervous on the plane; I was travelling on my own and was planning to stay with Matt (who in reality I barely knew despite talking almost every day since he had left Canada) and he lived with his parents and we were going to be travelling together! It was slightly awkward when we saw each other again for the first time but we quickly fell back into the easy comfort that had been discovered when we spent time together before. I made the most of being a London tourist and loved exploring the city!

June: Matt and I went to Liverpool for a birthday party and to see our friend Chris before taking a flight to Ireland. We rented a car and explored the Southern half of Ireland including: Galway, Killarney and Dublin. Miraculously, it only rained one day in Dublin making Ireland one of the highlights of my trip. After a week, Matt returned to London and I stayed in Dublin for another day before making my way up north to Belfast. It was a jam packed week with Belfast, the Giant's Causeway day trip, flying over to Scotland to see Glasgow and Edinburgh and then flying back to London to spend another week with Matt. At the end of that week, I flew to Munich, Germany to spend two weeks with my good friends Adrienne and Max. I might never have visited Germany and Austria if they weren't there but I'm so glad that I did!

July: I celebrated Canada day in Germany which was very fun (Adrienne is also Canadian and Max is German). I departed the next day for Greece and had my first (of three) horrific experiences with Olympic Airlines! After a week on my own, I quickly learned that the island I had selected was not ideal for solo travel. It was kind of like going to an all inclusive resort in Mexico by yourself...Matt and I met up in Santorini for a wonderful week together. We alternated between beach days and pool days and enjoyed live music most nights. Matt flew back to London while I headed on to Crete. This was an island I might not have visited but a girl I had met during my first week of travels was going there and we made plans to meet up. This was the week when intense homesickness set in and I was uncertain of how I was going to continue travelling. I spent the last week of July in Israel - half of the time in guest houses and the lat few days staying with the family of a soldier I had met back in January on the birthright trip. Travelling to Israel on my own was a completely different experience and I couldn't believe that only 6 months before I had wanted to move there. I cut my trip short and changed my flight so that I could fly back to London.

August: I spent the first three weeks in August back in London with Matt. By now were both realized that this was a relationship that was important to both of us and I had made the decision to move. I began to investigate visa and work options. We celebrated Matt's 28th birthday and attended the wedding of his good friends Clare and Simon where he was the best man. I was simultaneously dreading leaving but also ready to go home because I missed my family. We had an emotional good-bye at Heathrow. I'm not sure what the airport security thought as I cried my way through the metal detector. I arrived back and stayed with my mom for a few days before moving my stuff back into my apartment. I had subletted my apartment for the summer so I had to bring everything back. I knew that I only had 6 weeks left in Vancouver to pack up my life and move out of my apartment.

September: This was a month where every day was spent selling my possessions. It was a struggle for me to part with all of my things. I had to remind myself daily that it was only stuff and I was not defined by my stuff. I learned that I had accumulated possessions almost to the point of hoarder. While part of me felt freer getting rid of everything, another part of me was sad to see it go. I still have a few boxes stored in my mom's basement. I had a wonderful going-away party in my very empty apartment and had a shopping room where my friends could rummage through my belongings that I hadn't sold and take what they wanted before I took it to the charity shop. My sister and I scrubbed and prepared the apartment for its final inspection and thankfully received our full damage deposit back. I moved back in with my mom for my last week in Vancouver. Saying good bye to a city that I had grown to love so much was particularly hard. I still hope to live in Vancouver in my future. I packed up my car and Kylie, my younger sister, and I drove the twelve hours from Vancouver to Calgary and thankfully bonded instead of killing each other. We spent two nights at my dad's house before Kylie flew back and I moved in with my older sister for my live-in nanny position to begin.

October: My older sister was getting ready to give birth to her fourth child and we had worked out an arrangement where I was going to move in with her to help out with the older kids and the new baby and she and her husband would support me while I waited for my work visa before leaving for London. I knew it was going to a lot of work but I was looking forward to spending time with my nephews and niece. My new niece, Violet Isabel was born on October 13th. My older brother and his wife were also expecting and their son Seth Joseph was born on October 25th. I was very thankful that I got to be there to meet the newest additions to our families. I also got the chance to spend time with my dad's soon-to-be wife Shelley.

November: At the start of November, I was only three weeks away from departure. It didn't really hit me until about three days before I left though. I spent my time preparing the best that I knew how for an international move (insurance, banking info etc) and then had to sell my car. I am a horrible salesperson and settled for less because I wanted to be done with it. On November 24th, I tearfully said good bye to my dad, Shelley and my best friend Christine and the airport and boarded yet another traumatic flight. This time I didn't care that I was squashed in my seat or that I had painfully blocked sinuses, I knew that what was waiting for me at the other end was worth the 9 hours of discomfort. My bags were the last to come of the carousel (of course) and then I went through the gate to see Matt. It was as if the past three months hasn't even happened and we had never been apart. That night we picked up the keys to our new flat and moved in two days later!

December: This past months has been full of adjusting to a new flat, life and culture and unsuccessful job hunting. My plan is to stay positive, work on my resume and try to be less of a job snob and accept whatever jobs come my way. I painted the kitchen and the furniture and decorations have mostly arrived. It almost looks like we live here now! I drove a manual car on the other side of the road for the first time and have plans to continue driving lessons in the new year. With my abundance of free time, I have discovered that I'm actually a pretty decent cook. I spent Christmas with Matt's family (my second christmas ever) and tried my best to only say 'bah humbug' in my head. New Year's Eve this year was a low-key affair with dinner out and having friends over to our place.

I have very high hopes for 2010!!